5 CONCLUSION (Part 22 – end of chapter)

By analyzing all the books and poems we have translated and the samples provided above, for some of which we have supplied a second translation for comparison, we believe that we have met our own expectations of the re-creation of Whitman’s poetry into our language. Even though it is very difficult to criticize our own work, for we may fall prey to self-praise, by comparing our re-created poetic texts to other existing translations, it becomes clear that our approach to this task is at least different from the usual literal or almost literal translations, especially in regard to rhythm, as we have emphasized at the beginning of this chapter. We have been able to maintain the flow of the poems and we feel that their reading aloud shall show this, because we are constantly testing how they sound. What we mean by this is that we have always tried to find the best possible combination of sounds in each verse or parts of verse. Our purpose in this, it is not to make the verses sound beautiful, but to set the best phonic combination to transmit the sense of the verse in English. There are cases in which the effect might be exactly the opposite, that is, to describe scenes where evil thoughts and diseases are present. Besides, we have performed a careful work on vocabulary, so that the passages or words in the original that convey a sense of strangeness could be transmitted in Portuguese that way. However, there is more than just strangeness: Whitman liked to use words borrowed from other languages, such as French, Spanish and native American languages (ex.: savant, Libertad, Paumanok), he liked to write words with “k” (Kanadian, kosmos), and he sometimes changed the spelling of words (he wrote “carlacue” in section 20 of “Song of Myself,” but the correct spelling is “curlicue” or “curlicue”). Together with his extensive vocabulary in Leaves of Grass, more than 13,000 words, the task of researching and checking every single word is tremendous. In this case, the Norton Critical Edition (WHITMAN, 2002) has been of great help with its incredible number of notes to poems and vocabulary. We have done the same thorough action regarding grammatical structures and punctuation, as well as Whitman’s way of using certain collocations, particularly with adjectives, which he tends to use where they do not fit in correct English (he likes to use adjectives after the nouns, which is not considered syntactically acceptable in the English language). As in Portuguese the adjectives can go before or after the nouns, we have always tried to arrange them in the best way possible, that is, to maintain the original atmosphere of the poems. Another aspect that we have re-created with utmost care is the use of the –ing forms, whether they are verbs or nouns, since they are an essential part of Whitman’s verse.

Apart from all that we have written before, we do know that a translator’s job is never finished, for every time we return to the poems we will look for any kinds of mistakes, and we will certainly find them, and we will verify every verse again trying to make it better, as we have done with our previous re-creations. However, we also know that there is a time when our eyes are not able to find mistakes any more, due to excessive proximity to the texts. Thus, we leave this task now, as well as the judgment on our work, to the critics and readers. Paraphrasing Whitman, we are pleased with what we have done with the poems.

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A Note On Poetic Translation

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We have learned over the years that a translator’s choice of an author is a very important step in his work. There are a number of reasons for that and many aspects to consider, for one can not have a deep relationship with a text one does not enjoy.

This aspect is taken into consideration when we look at how we accomplish our task, for it is necessary to understand, or at least to interpret, the spirit of the author inscribed in the words of his works, in order to arrive at a given version of the re-created text in the target language (we use the expression “poetic re-creation” to indicate a type of translation that is more than a literal translation, it aims at re-creating the original atmosphere of the texts, rhythm, meter, and specific diction of a poet). This means we have to have a deep comprehension of it.

Haroldo de Campos, a well-known Brazilian translator and poet, shows us, in “Da Tradução Como Criação e Como Crítica” (“Translation As Creation and As Criticism”), how important the understanding of an author’s works is when he considers that: “Translation of poetry [...] is primarily an inner grasp of the world and technique of what is translated” (CAMPOS, 1992, p.43). It means that grasping the world of our chosen text takes time and mental effort, for we need to apprehend or, in Whitman’s words, “absorb”, every bit of linguistic, poetic and aesthetic information in the text and on the text in order to proceed the translation. This requires a number of years in close contact with the author’s works, particularly when the task involves extensive works by the same author. This points out to the questions of closeness or familiarity of the translator critic with the text and his choice of an author. However, these two points are a priori in my current research (I am re-creating a series of poems and books from Leaves of Grass into Portuguese for my doctorate), since our work is the continuation of what we did in our Master’s thesis, ten years ago. Thus, only by establishing a deep relationship with the author and his/hers works, can a translator do a good job of transposing a piece of literary art into another language.

Note: for those who read Portuguese, my poetic re-creations are available

at Mr. Kind.